I have a hard time distinguishing the exact color of my skin. I like to think of my skin as being light brown with a bronzy glow, but others might say it's more pale with an orange glow. If you know your color wheel... white plus orange is pretty much YELLOW.... which now with my new discovery of "Jaundice" is the color of death. A few days ago, I was talking to a friend who told me that a friend of a friend's sister turned yellow one morning and died. Healthy as can be and one morning her liver gave out, got Jaundice, and died. People really shouldn't tell me stories like this.
A few days post storytelling, my upper right abdomen started to to throb. I thought it was a stomach ache and popped a few tums. The next morning the throbbing didn't subside. I looked in the mirror and noticed that my skin color
was more yellow than normal and I began to worry. All the worrying of course made it worse and turned a mild pain into a sharp stabbing pain. Web MD told me it was liver damage. Mayo Clinic told me it was liver damage. And my parents told me it was liver damage. Symptoms include - Jaundice, upper right abdomen pain that shifts to your back, and belching. Causes are - Hepatitis, Alcoholism, Crohn's Disease, and TYLENOL.... Crap, I have liver damage. A few months ago I had two root canals (but diagnosed them as migraines) and ate Tylenol for Breakfast, Lunch, and Dinner for about 3 months straight. This must have definitely ruined my liver. And now I am going to die with a liver that looks like an ash tray.
was more yellow than normal and I began to worry. All the worrying of course made it worse and turned a mild pain into a sharp stabbing pain. Web MD told me it was liver damage. Mayo Clinic told me it was liver damage. And my parents told me it was liver damage. Symptoms include - Jaundice, upper right abdomen pain that shifts to your back, and belching. Causes are - Hepatitis, Alcoholism, Crohn's Disease, and TYLENOL.... Crap, I have liver damage. A few months ago I had two root canals (but diagnosed them as migraines) and ate Tylenol for Breakfast, Lunch, and Dinner for about 3 months straight. This must have definitely ruined my liver. And now I am going to die with a liver that looks like an ash tray.
I went to the herbal store and bought seven different kinds of herbs that were supposed to rejuvenate the liver. I cut out all fried food, sweets, and meats from my diet. And spent seventy two dollars and sixty three cents on "How to Cope with a Damaged Liver" inspirational book. Nothing was working, the pain was constant. I tried to resist calling my doctor because she thinks I'm nuts but I couldn't help it. I finally broke down. I called my pediatrician and told her my worries. She took a blood test. Negative. I was not convinced, I went to my second doctor. Blood test = negative. Still not convinced. I went to my third doctor. Blood test = negative.... CT scan = negative and an Ultra Sound = negative. Jaundice = due to using a very cheap self tanning lotion and Hypochondira. But still.... negative.
With all this negativness my doctor diagnosed me with anxiety. Thank God you can't die from anxiety....
Or can you?
